resilient life

  It is really easy to get caught up in life. 3 things going wrong and it feels like 30. A bad day at work can make challenges at home seem like there is too much going on.  In nursing school I really enjoyed psychology, and behavioral health would be a topic that always peaked my interest. There is a theory on what drives our behavior called Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.  To simplify, It's a pyramid with layers. The very base, or foundation of the pyramid is physiological needs; food, water, air etc. Things we need to survive. Next is safety; are we in immediate danger? There is a storm coming, do we have shelter? It continues to love and belonging, self esteem and accomplishments, and finally self actualization and higher purpose or finding meaning. In order to progress to higher levels in the pyramid, we need to meet the needs of the lower levels. I bring this up because it has helped me put things into perspective.  Taking care of patients in the hospital and my h...

  Now is where there is happiness… Peace is in this moment. Joy isn’t in the past. It is now. We can remember past joys, but, why borrow a feeling from yesterday when we can feel it today.  Joy isn't in the future. It is now. We can day dream and hope for a joy tomorrow may bring, but why wish for tomorrow's joy when we can feel it today. My Husband's cancer gave him 9 months and we got 28 together before he finally got the rest he earned after a long fight.  How much time did I spend worrying about his death when I could have been celebrating his life?  Be present. It is now that there is that possibility of joy.. You can find that peace now. Dance. Sing. Move. Tell your people you love them. Hug more. Speak kinder. Take that chance. Steal that kiss (consensually).  Carpe Diem, Seize the day. Cause you cant do anything with the past but remember and you cant do anything with the future but daydream or fret.  One day at a time friends.  xo

    Don’t over complicate things. Try not to plan the path further than you can see, too many paths and things change. Focus on where you are at this moment and where your foot is landing next. It was late May 2020, I was still working full time at the hospital and hubbs was still full time fighting his cancer. I was always worried about my next 5, 10, 50, and 1,000 steps… it was a waste of energy and only made me more frazzled. The path I was walking required me to continue to work, get my FMLA paperwork done, and make sure the hubbs got to his doctor appointments. His path was to drink water, eat well and rest. I spent a lot of time trying to peer into a crystal ball i didn't have. I was anxious and held my breath for the first 6 months of his diagnosis before I hit one of my first walls.  At this point he was still wiping his own booty and craving a beer once in a while. He wasn't really sick yet. I was trying to map out a plan for him being sick when I should have spe...

  "It's not the load that breaks you down: it's the way you carry it." — Lena Horne Are you kind to yourself? Do you place impossible expectations on yourself or do you feel like you are struggling to meet perceived expectations from others? I feel you. 3 years ago, I took on a lot and I was not kind to myself. Spent my days at the hospital, trying to be the very best nurse. No excuses. Had to be perfect. Ran errands in a COVID world. Maintained my 6 feet, wore my mask and washed my hands. No room for failing to be diligent in protecting myself and my family. Cared for the hubbs who was fighting cancer. Stiff upper lip. No crying. Be positive. Keep the house clean. Make sure he drinks his protein shake and takes his pills. After all that I’d beat myself up. Why didn't I go on that run. Why did I forget to make time for journaling/prayer. I should have walked the dog instead of just letting him out. We are not always kind to ourselves. Life happens, and sometimes y...